Too long...

The apologies from me are plentiful. Gratefully, so much going on in our lives, yet taking the time to really talk about how I am fairing seems hard to put into words because then it makes "it" real.

I think the only way to catch up is just in snippets.

* As of last Thursday, our house of 14yrs is for sale! The work of my "guy" (our favorite painter/ can do anything man) the storage container, two dumpsters, my sister and especially Melissa and Kelly W. will never be the same. Honestly, there was a day Kelly had our craft shelves packed AND the entire bookcase loaded into the storage container by herself before I could blink. It is incredible to feel the love of friendship. Besides the fact she has the uncanny ability to talk John into getting rid of his treasures -aka crap like no one else.

* Henry, Sarah and Margo were hit by a horrible virus. Fever, sore throat and yucky stomach. Sarah was hit the hardest and not only went to one Children's hospital but two in one day. There were questions of her appendix and even mono but ultimately it all came down to the virus. It took a long time for her to fully recover. How the rest of us were spared is truly a miracle and a blessing.

* Johns Mom celebrated her birthday of a number I am not allowed to mention :) Unfortunately, during her celebration, Sarah and I were at children's and missed all of the fun. She is one of my favorite women in my life and I don't think she believes how grateful I am to have her not only in my life but also such a wonderful mother-in-law.

* We are in Florida with the Riehles. A friend of ours gave us their house for the week and we are having a much needed, fun filled time together . Again the blessings and generosity of friends just amaze me. I will add some pictures later since Margo is bugging me to go watch her swim and I have spent too much time away from the fun.

* Ok, let's just hit the nail on the head... Since we last talked, things have gotten better in some ways yet worse in others. During my time "away," I have really tried to focus and get back to my Faith and relationship with God. It is easy with so much stuff going on to lose that focus. I am trying very hard to just listen and believe He has my best interest in mind and really have Faith. I've come to the conclusion that while I do believe this, I don't necessarily have to like it. :)
The last time I went for chemo, I was struggling and Dr. M and I worked on changing and tweaking my meds. She also showed us a report showing a total 74.4% reduction in all tumors since I started this clinical trial! So, even though this chemo has given me more serious side effects than all of my others combined, how do you NOT say " sure! Plug me in again!"

* I am having horrible neuropathy in my hands, feet and legs. I can't feel them until I just feel pain. It is frustrating, embarrassing and scary. I have fallen twice- once at Applebee's trying to pick up Margo. My legs just gave out. It is such a weird feeling and the weakness and how slow I am frankly just pisses me off.

* Because of my side effects, chemo has again been postponed. Something I used to fear, now I am grateful for. Go figure huh?

I am not liking where I am physically in this whole cancer process but am happy that I am again trying to focus on what is best for not only me but for my family.

More to come...

Again I would so appreciate prayers and good thoughts and I promise to update soon- with pictures!

Smooches, Kate